Author Archive: Natasha McKenna

Achieving Your Vision Through Small Changes

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When seniors sit down with our credit counsellor they are often looking for that second set of eyes, an unbiased opinion or advice without emotions attached. “Are my living expenses too high?”, “Should I be spending less on entertainment?”, “Am I spending too much of my savings?” The answers to these questions are not black and white, and require us to closely look at the person’s budget and ask, “How do you want to live your life?”

By creating a monthly budget, you are able to determine if you are overspending or under spending, allowing you to make necessary changes to help you live within your means and prevent a financial crisis. It is important to remember that budgeting is not about penny pinching, it is about being in control of your finances and having vision.

Sit down and think about how you want to live your life. What makes you happy and brings you joy? What do you want to accomplish in the next five years? What legacy do you wish to leave behind? Now take a look at your budget and consider how you can change your spending habits to accommodate this vision.

There are many ways to cut back on expenses whilst continuing to live well. Let’s begin by looking at essential expenses: those things you require to survive. Housing is usually one of the larger expenses; you may want to think about a roommate, not only could they help you save money, but also offer companionship. You can also lower costs by trading in the high maintenance house/yard for an apartment or mini home, possibly even in an area where you can walk to shopping and entertainment.

Groceries and medications can add up. Be sure to do your grocery shopping on days when senior discounts are available, look for sales, and consider buying in bulk and splitting with a friend. When you require a medical prescription let your doctor know if you do not have a medical plan, and always ask your pharmacist if a less expensive generic brand is available.

Cutting back on non-essential expenses may appear easier, as these are things you do not require to survive. You do however require good mental health, and it is important to have fun and be social so consider low cost alternatives. Instead of going to the movies borrow one from the library, look for free community based classes and activities, shop at second hand stores or during sale seasons and eat out at restaurants that offer discounts to seniors.

Small changes can have a large impact on your budgets bottom line, allowing you to take that vacation you always wanted, leave something behind for the grandchildren, have an emergency fund and be healthy and happy!

Seniors and Sexuality

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167Staying healthy and feeling your best is important at any age and that does not change just because you are aging. As we enter our senior years, we experience an increasing number of major life changes; how we handle and grow from these changes is the key to staying healthy.

Sex is an important part of emotional and physical health. In a relationship, sexual activity allows you to establish intimacy and express your feelings for your partner. It also benefits your physical health by reducing stress and making you feel good about yourself.
Senior sex isn’t the same as it was in your 20’s — but it can still be satisfying. Contrary to common myths about sexuality and older adults, sexual interest is not just for the young. Many seniors continue to enjoy their sexuality into their 80’s and beyond. You can have a healthy, enjoyable sex life at any age.

A healthy sex life is not only fulfilling, but it’s also good for other aspects of your life, including your physical health and self-esteem. Here are some tips for maintaining a healthy and enjoyable sex life as you age:

• Talk with your partner. It may be difficult to talk about sex if you haven’t in the past, but openly talking with your partner about your needs, desires and concerns can help you both enjoy sex and intimacy more.

• Visit your doctor. Your doctor can help you manage chronic conditions and medications that affect your sex life. If you have trouble maintaining an erection or reaching orgasm, ask your doctor about medications or other treatments for these problems.

• Expand your definition of sex. Intercourse is only one way to have fulfilling sex. Touching, kissing and other intimate sexual contact can be just as rewarding for both you and your partner. Realize that as you age, it’s normal for you and your partner to have different sexual abilities and needs. Be open to finding new ways to enjoy sexual contact and intimacy.

• Adapt your routine. Simple changes can improve your sex life. Change the time of day when you have sex to a time when you have the most energy, such as in the morning. Try a new sexual position or explore other new ways of connecting romantically and sexually.

• Don’t give up on romance. If you’ve lost your partner, it can be difficult to imagine starting another relationship, but socializing is well worth the effort for many single seniors. No one outgrows the need for emotional closeness and intimacy. If you start an intimate relationship with a new partner, be sure to practice safe sex. Many older adults are unaware that they are still at risk of sexually transmitted diseases.

And a final piece of advice for maintaining a healthy sex life: Take good care of yourself. Eat healthy, stay active, don’t drink too much alcohol, and don’t smoke or use illegal drugs. Be sure to see your doctor regularly, especially if you have any chronic health conditions or take prescription medications. Remember, just because we are getting older does not mean we can’t still have fun!

Christina Campbell is a General Therapist with a specialization in sexual and intimacy issues

How to Handle the Empty Nest Syndrome

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173By Courtney Hope

Are you an empty nester? See how other Canadian parents deal with change once the kids leave home.

If you have children it is inevitable that, at some point, they’re going to leave home — whether to go to school, travel, get married or start families of their own. While all parents know this, it can still be a hard reality to face. After raising children and having them close at hand for 18 (or more) years, seeing them take off on their own can be tough. But just what kind of adjustment can you expect when you’re left with an empty nest?

To learn more about what it’s really like once the kids are gone, we turned to the world of social media to ask some of our readers about their experiences of dealing with their empty nests.

1. It feels like an ending
While living independently is a new beginning for the child, it can feel like an ending for many parents. “It seems to me that it is much like finishing a really good book,” says Kathy from Calgary, Alta., who experienced a great deal of sadness in the weeks following her oldest daughter’s marriage.

When a child leaves home, it isn’t just the end of a chapter in your life, but also the beginning of another. Use this time to enjoy your time with your spouse, and get excited for what the future holds for your children. “You are a little disappointed that the book is finished, but really happy that you got to enjoy it and really looking forward to the sequel.”

2. The house will be quieter than you think
One of the most common complaints from empty nesters is how hard it is to lay awake at night and hear every little creak your house makes. “The fridge is always full. There are no wet towels on the floor, no doors slamming, no phones ringing, no late-night chats, no random hugs,” says Sandi, a mother of three from Montreal. “There is just too much quiet.” Remember, though, initiating something like a monthly or even weekly family dinner is a great way to bring a little life back into your home and keep your family bond strong.

3. Filling the void can be hard
Parents love to joke about how great it is to have their children and grandchildren come home, spoil them for a bit and then send them back on their way. But often the feelings of emptiness can return each time you have to send your offspring away.

“I think one of the biggies for me is finding out just how tough it can be to fill the emptiness of that nest,” says Mike, a father of three from Brampton, Ont., adding “not physically, mind you, but emotionally.” Prepare yourself by truly enjoying your time with your children when they are around, then talking through the emotions you experience with your spouse once they leave.

4. It takes time to adjust 
It can be hard learning to live without your children being home anymore. Not only will you have to adjust to an empty house, you will have to get to know your spouse all over again, as a partner, not just a co-parent. “When it becomes just the two of you again, you feel a little guilty and a little sad,” says Sandi. “Guilty because you know you can do whatever you want whenever, but sad because you have spent so many years getting them ready to go and never really realized how fast that day would come.”

Don’t expect everything to change in an instant. Accept that it will take time to make these adjustments, and learn to laugh at the experience of re-learning things with your partner.

5. It’s OK to want them back

You can be happy for your children, but at the same time wish that you could keep them with you. “If I could, I would buy a huge house in the country with three floors,” says Karen, a mother of two grown children in Collingwood, Ont. “Each of us would have our own place, our own space and yet still be together.” It’s OK to want your children to return home once they’ve left. Some do, once they finish schooling or travelling, or when they decide to have children of their own. But if they don’t, it just means you have to put in more of an effort to reach out and remain close.
Whether they’ve flown the nest or will soon, losing your children to the next stages of their lives can be a difficult and emotional process. Use this time not only to reconnect with your spouse, but to take pride in your children’s successes and to get to know them in a whole new way.

By Courtney Hope

Sourced from: http://www.canadianliving.com/relationships

Should You Help Your Adult Children Financially?

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It’s hard not to offer financial help if your children need it. But make sure you’re being smart about it by following these four tips for helping your grown kids financially.

Long gone are the days where people got a great job out of school, got married at 20 and started having a family early in life. Today, many people are living at home longer and mooching off their parents for what seems like an eternity. Even if adult children do have a family of their own, they’re often still asking their parents for financial help.

It’s tough for parents to say no, but at some point, they have think about saving money for their own retirement. However, parents don’t have to cut their kids off completely. Here are four good ways parents can help provide financial support to their children.

1. Offer financial help with education
A lot of grandparents help pay for their grandchildren’s education. School costs are enormous, so this is a great way to help the family and do it in a way that has long-lasting benefits.

Anyone can set up an RESP, so open one for a grandchild and put their birthday money in it every year. By the time they get to university, they’ll hopefully have enough saved up to get them through school.

2. Help with a down payment on a home

If you have money to spare, consider helping your adult child with the down payment on their first house. The hardest thing for most young adults to do is get into the real estate market, but it’s much easer to stay in it once they’re there.Not only are you investing in your kids’ future by doing this, but there’s a good chance that their property will rise in value over the years. If they end up selling their house one day, you may be able to get some of that cash back — or at least know that you’ve helped them make a wise financial investment.
3. Create a trust
If you want your child to have some money when they’re older, set up a trust instead of just handing over the dough. The trust allows you to stipulate rules, such as at what age the child gets the money and what they have to do with it.It’s a good tool to make sure your children spend that money responsibly. While you’re waiting for the money to be doled out, you can invest it in the market and, hopefully, grow the assets.4. Buy a business
Does your adult child have trouble keeping a job? It may be because he or she just hasn’t found the right one. Consider buying your offspring a business. Entrepreneurship drives the Canadian economy so there are plenty of companies to own.Purchase something they’re passionate about. Keep an ownership stake so you can get regular dividends and, if they eventually sell, you can get some of the cash back.

The idea is to be productive with your money. Rather than just giving your adult child a credit card to shop with, give them something that has positive returns — both financially and personally.

By Bryan Borzykowski

Sourced from: http://www.canadianliving.com/life/money/

7 Ways of Dealing with your Child’s “Back to School Jitters”

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116Restless nights. Loss of appetite. Tummy aches. People say those are some of the signs your child may be feeling anxious about going back to school. But don’t worry, this is quite normal. Anxious feelings are expected during times of transition or change. This is especially true for children and teens going back to school, or for first-timers starting kindergarten. Prior to the first day of school, your child may cling, cry, have temper tantrums, complain, and become irritable. Here are some ways to get your child ready for going back to school.

1. Talk to your kids about what’s bothering them; be mindful that young children may have difficulty expressing their fears. Older kids may be uncomfortable opening up. Try approaching the subject in an informal setting, such as while you’re out for a walk or out for dinner, so they don’t feel like they’re being put on the spot.

2. Get children back on their regular sleep routine; this should be done weeks before school starts. Sleep in the key to relieving anxiety. Preschoolers need 11 to 13 hours a night; elementary school kids need 10 to 11 hours; preteens and teens should get 8 to 9 hours.

3. Make a list of your child’s fears and find strategies for helping them cope with them and to overcome them.

4. Get your child excited about school by letting them select items such as a new school bag, lunch box, and other supplies.

5. Remind your kids that the school year isn’t just about academics, but also social and sport activities; talk to them about the clubs and sports they would like to get involved in to make there school year better.

6. Explain that new situations can be stressful and scary but that they do get better with familiarity.

7. The night before school, have children prepare their outfit, school bag and lunch rather than in the morning so it is less of a rush.

Learning About Rapid Ejaculation

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***We are happy to present a series of articles on sexual and intimacy issues, written by our very own therapist Christina Campbell who has an extensive history working in the field of sexology. This series is the result of positive feedback from previous articles, and will cover topics that negatively affect couples. Please know that the content is intended for a mature audience and reader discretion is advised. Should you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact us using the contact page on our website.

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99Defining Premature Ejaculation (PE) or Rapid Ejaculation (RE) has been difficult, as there is a lack of a clear and universally accepted definition of the condition. The idea of “normal” ejaculation varies by country and can differ based on the patient/client or their partner.

The guideline of the American Urological Association uses a definition of “ejaculation that occurs sooner than desired, either before or shortly after penetration, causing distress to either one or both partners”.  This definition, along with others, acknowledges three core components: short ejaculatory latency; lack of control over ejaculation; and lack of sexual satisfaction.

Rapid ejaculation affects most men at some point in their life. In addition, it is the most common sexual disorder in men younger than 40 years, with 30-70% males in the United States affected to some degree at one time or another.

Most researchers differentiate between two forms of RE: a primary (lifelong) and secondary (acquired) form, which may have distinct causes.

What are the causes of RE?

Physiological causes of RE: Like many areas of medicine, before doctors knew any better, the cause was thought to be psychological, but in reality there are many interacting factors. New research techniques have begun to shed light on some of the physiologic factors of RE, like hypersensitivity of the ejaculation reflex and of the sensory receptors on the penis. We know that the particular levels and combinations of neurotransmitters like adrenalin and serotonin in different people will play into the equation as well.

Historically, rapid ejaculation was not a subject most men felt comfortable talking about, but as medical reasons for RE became more public, this improved.

Medical conditions and the development of RE:

Rapid Ejaculation can be the result of a medical cause, like prostatitis, if it develops later in life. This should prompt men to see a doctor. Sometimes RE develops in conjunction with erectile dysfunction (ED). This too should prompt a visit to a physician so that any underlying medical conditions, like diabetes or vascular disease (to name just a few), can be uncovered or ruled out.

Research now shows us that the majority of RE cases are due to a combination of both psychosocial and physical factors. Psychological issues, such as increased anxiety, depression, and negative relationship dynamics, may greatly influence treatment outcomes. Furthermore, RE can worsen the psychosocial issues that may have originally caused the problem, creating a vicious cycle.

What are the consequences of RE? Often Rapid Ejaculation results in a great deal of frustration, depression, and marital discord, but not always. Younger men usually have a short “unmanageable period.” This is the time it takes to regain their erection after ejaculation; depending on the length of this period, sometimes it is easy to ignore the problem. After ejaculation they can just resume intercourse as soon as the erection recurs. It is only when the unmanageable period increases with age that RE starts to be a problem for the couple. His partner may be just getting started, and suddenly, he’s done.

If the man’s self-image suffers or if his partner’s disappointment is particularly evident, then the problem can become much worse. Blaming oneself or one’s partner can add a whole other dimension of “dis-ease” not typically seen with other medical conditions. In this case, if proper help is not sought, RE can lead to separation or break up.

RE significantly negatively impacts men and their partners and may prevent single men from forming new partner relationships. On the other hand, men are reluctant to seek treatment from their physicians, although they may be more encouraged to do so through their partner’s support and the availability of effective treatments (Rosen & Althof, 2008).

Treatment and drugs

Treatment options for premature ejaculation include sexual therapy, medications and psychotherapy. For many men, a combination of these treatments works best.

Sexual therapy
It is a good idea to see a sex therapist, a psychologist, or a family doctor who deals with sexual problems. If there are doubts, resistance, or communication barriers, seeing a therapist with your partner might be helpful. These problems are readily solvable, and in the end, increased communication between partners can result in more intimacy.

In some cases, sexual therapy may involve simple steps, such as applying techniques to prolong ejaculation without having intercourse. At first, it may be recommended to avoid intercourse for a period of time and re-focus on other types of sexual play so that pressure can be regulated. One of the techniques used in therapy is the squeeze technique. By repeating this technique as many times as necessary, you can reach the point of entering your partner without ejaculating. After a few practice sessions, the feeling of knowing how to delay ejaculation may become a habit that no longer requires the squeeze technique.

Taking the emphasis off intercourse can remove the worry about ejaculating too soon — and it can help lay the foundation for a more fulfilling sexual relationship

Medications
Certain antidepressants and topical anesthetic creams are used to treat premature ejaculation. Although none of these drugs are specifically approved by the Food and Drug Administration to treat premature ejaculation, some are used for this purpose.

Cognitive behavioral therapy
This approach, also known as counselling or talk therapy, can help you reduce performance anxiety or find effective ways of coping with stress and solving problems. Counselling is most likely to help when it’s used in combination with other therapies.

Many men who experience premature ejaculation feel frustrated and even ashamed. It may help you to know that this problem is common and often very treatable.

Open communication between sexual partners, as well as a willingness to try a variety of approaches to help both partners feel satisfied, can help reduce conflict and performance anxiety. If you’re not satisfied with your sexual relationship, talk with your partner about your concerns and discuss the options for getting help.

Resources from:

Tips to Consider When Talking to Your Kids About Finances

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School’s out for summer! Now’s the time to talk to your kids about money.

June 27th, 2013 by TD Wealth Management

It’s that time of year when textbooks go back on shelves, pencils and pens go back in their holders and staplers sit stagnant on desks – school is out for the summer. But, that doesn’t mean learning should end when the final bell rings.

The summer months can be a great time to teach children about financial literacy. From budgeting for a trip to the grocery store, to keeping track of expenses or saving for a special purchase, instilling early savings habits and money management practices can have a positive impact on kids’ financial future.

For some parents, offering too much information or not enough is where it can get tricky. So, how do you find the right balance?

Here are a few tips to consider when talking to your kids about finances…

·         Find age-appropriate ways to talk about money – It’s important to make money lessons relevant for your child’s age so they know what they should be saving for. For young children, it could mean saving for a special toy or a bike, and for teenagers and young adults, it could be investing in post-secondary education or planning to move out of the house on their own.

·         Explain that saving and investing can help achieve their goals – Educating your children on savings and investing products can help them understand why they should be putting money away, and how to make it grow faster. If they’re entering college or university, consider teaching them about interest and the basics of generating returns on investments.

·         Talk about savings as an investment for their future – Teaching your children to ‘pay themselves first’ can help introduce the value of saving for a long-term goal. For most children, a savings account is the first step. When they start to generate a steady stream of income, it might be time for them to consider using a service that automatically puts money aside.

Make it real

Learning a thing or two about the value of budgeting, saving and investing can help children realize that it’s not always easy – and that it takes some planning and practice to reach their financial goals. It’s important to start the conversation early and continue having it over time. The lessons may work best if they are set in real-life situations, instead of just a single sit-down talk.

Kim Parlee is Vice President at TD Wealth Management and host of MoneyTalk on Business      News Network. TD Waterhouse provides a full range of investment and wealth management  services.

Affordable Summer Fun!

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80On summer vacation and looking for some cheap fun activities to keep you and your family busy? You are in the right spot! There are many activities you can do and places you can see all over PEI that are affordable and fun for everyone!

If you are interested in parks that are fun for the whole family there is Sandspit Amusement Park in Cavendish, home to PEI’s largest rollercoaster, a ferris wheel and the Rock N’ Roll. Burlington Amusement Park also offers affordable fun, with Go Karts and batting cages. Last but not least, Shining Waters Family Fun Park is the place to cool off on a hot day, with numerous water slides and also a variety of farm animals!

On a rainy day, practice your golfing at Black Magic Indoor Mini Golf or go take a look at Ripley’s believe it or not or Wax World of the Stars, all located in Cavendish. Not in the budget? Perhaps car-load night at Brackley Drive-in Theatre is more affordable. Enjoy watching movies outdoors or in your car and the best part: you feel like you’re back in the 1950’s!

For low to no cost adventures, the beach is a great place for the whole family to go and relax, make sand castles, and enjoy the beautiful ocean. PEI has miles of beautiful beaches, each one with its own character. Looking for sand that sings? Try scuffing your toes at Basin Head. Prefer lots of company? Then stop by Cavendish or Brackley Beach. Who among us does not have a happy memory of a family day at the beach, when the atmosphere was so relaxed that we didn’t even notice the sand in the sandwiches?

There will be numerous Exhibitions taking place all across PEI this month. These events are generally very affordable and FUN! In Prince County there will be the Tyne Valley Oyster Festival, and the Kensington Harvest Festival. In Queen’s County there is the Old Home Week in Charlottetown. And last, in the King’s County area there will be the Northumberland Fisheries Festival and the Eastern Kings Festival. All these events will be happening all summer long so be sure not to miss out on all the fun!

Erectile Dysfunction and Your Relationship- Part 2

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***We are happy to present a series of articles on sexual and intimacy issues, written by our very own therapist Christina Campbell who has an extensive history working in the field of sexology. This series is the result of positive feedback from previous articles, and will cover topics that negatively affect couples. Please know that the content is intended for a mature audience and reader discretion is advised. Should you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact us using the contact page on our website.

In last months article we introduced readers to the concept of erectile dysfunction, its causes and how it affects a relationship. In part 2 we will now look at how to approach the problem of erectile dysfunction and what treatment may be beneficial.

How should you approach the problem?

Being able to talk about is a huge and first step. “Opening the lines of communication is paramount in resolving ED”, says Marian Dunn, PhD, “ED is not initially easy to talk about. But not talking about it can seriously damage a relationship.”

Sandy has been in a relationship for 11 months with a man who suffers from ED. “We’ve worked hard on handling it,” she says, “and we talk about it all the time, which really helps.” In addition to encouraging her partner to see his doctor for a physical exam, Sandy says that being able to talk about the situation has actually brought the two closer together.

Dr. Janice Lipsky says that “Women don’t need to take responsibility for their partner’s ED, but many women can and do play a critical role in supporting men to seek treatment.”

Is there anything to learn during treatment? Is treatment beneficial or not?

One of the benefits of treatment — be it medical or psychological, or a combination of the two — says Donahey, is that it can educate both partners about ED. It’s important to realize, for example, that just as a woman’s sexual responses may change as she ages, so, too, do a man’s. “A man’s sexual response rate also slows down as he gets older,” Donahey points out, therefore, in his 40s or 50s, he may need more direct stimulation of the penis. On the other side, a woman shouldn’t take this as a sign that her partner finds her unattractive.”

Donahey also suggests that couples expand their definition of what sexuality is so that they can maintain their physical intimacy. “Be more flexible,” she advises. “There’s more to sex than just intercourse … try manual stimulation, oral stimulation, stroking, kissing. These are all a part of an intimate relationship and can lead to an orgasm for both partners.

What can be done about Erectile Dysfunction?
Lots can be done about it. Don’t let yourself get into a hopeless mode. Talk to your doctor about the problem.

The first thing your doctor will do is to make sure you’re getting the right treatment for any health problems that could be causing or worsening your erectile dysfunction.

A variety of options exist for treating erectile dysfunction. Your doctor can explain the risks and benefits of each treatment and will consider your preferences. Your partner’s preferences also may play a role in treatment choices.

How can Sex Therapy help?

Talking with a counsellor skilled in ways to optimize sexual function is a proven erectile dysfunction treatment on its own. It can also maximize the results of other types of erectile dysfunction treatment — and ease concerns associated with erectile dysfunction

Sex therapy focuses on promoting effective communication about sex and learning techniques to improve sexual function among couples, which can ease stress and improve erectile function.

Although one-on-one counseling for erectile dysfunction can help, sex therapy usually works best when the client’s partner attends counselling sessions too.

The good news for many men is that ED can be prevented or treated, safely and effectively. If you have ED, there is hope and there is help. Talk to your health provider and a sex therapist.

The Gift of Financial Literacy

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By: Shannon Ryan

Sourced from: http://www.frugalrules.com/gift-financial-literacy/

When I was thirteen, my father started giving me money lessons. He didn’t focus on how it worked, but instead helped me develop a good relationship with money. He taught me how our emotions drive our spending, so if I wasn’t careful my emotions, be it anger, fear, frustration or even happiness could leave me with an empty pocketbook and no money for the things that truly mattered to me. His lessons changed how I viewed money and ultimately led me to became a Certified Financial Planner, so that I could help others build a positive relationship with their money. Financial literacy is my passion and I love what I do, but there are some troubling trends that concern me. We live in amazing times, yet our financial literacy continues to erode year-after-year.

  • 61% of adults surveyed in the National Financial Capability Study received a failing grade in 2012 versus 58% in 2009 according to CNBC.

I look at my daughters and their friends who want to conquer the world, but I know without a strong grasp of finances, the world might conquer them instead. There is great debate around who is responsible for teaching children about money. Some say parents; some say schools. I say both. Parents are ultimately the best teacher, but so many are unaware they even need to talk to their kids about money or are too embarrassed by their own lack of financial knowledge. Even if kids start learning about personal finance in school, parents are not off the hook. Our kids are always observing us, including how we handle money. Some parents are unintentionally passing along poor money habits and beliefs to their kids. This leads some to wonder who we should educate first: parents or kids? It’s a little bit like the chicken or egg debate—does it really matter who came first? Let’s educate both. What I don’t want is another generation of kids to grow up financially illiterate while we wait for their parents to get educated. This cycle stops now. There is no reason why parents and children cannot learn about money together. In our family, we refer to our money as family money and often give the girls a voice in how we use it. This is something I strongly encourage you to do as well and suggest you start by setting family save, spend and share goals.

Save Family Money for What Matters Most

You can decide together or beforehand, but just make sure the goal is something the family will be excited to achieve and is obtainable. For us, this is often our family vacation. We announce our plans over a favorite meal, and then we talk about it, often.

Success Tip: This also becomes your answer when your kids get the “I wants”. Instead of saying “no,” remind them of the family save goal. For example, “I like that doll too. It’s really nice! But remember, we’re saving our money for our big trip to Disneyland, which is so important to me. Is it important to you too? Good. That’s why I’m choosing to use our family money to go to Disneyland with you over the toy. What ride should we go on first?” Essentially you’re eliminating any feelings of deprivation by refocusing their attention on the family goal.

Spend Family Money and Make Conscious Decisions

Here is where you really have a chance to flex those decision-making muscles as a family. Every day we spend money and sometimes without much thought. The real trick to handling money is making conscious decisions that honor your values and goals. One way we demonstrate this is through our entertainment budget. I give the girls various options, with one choice using the entire budget and others of varying cost. To my surprise, they often choose the more inexpensive options, so they can do more things. But best of all—they understand that afterwards the money is gone and they don’t beg me or their Dad to spend money on other things.

Success Tip: Create a grocery challenge with the goal to lower your monthly bills and use the extra money for a fun family day (unless the money is better served going towards debt repayment). Have them help you plan meals and search for coupons and sales.

Share Family Money to Enrich Lives

At a recent event, I asked a group of children how their family shared their money. Absolute silence. Now, I know for a fact their parents are philanthropic, but clearly their kids were unaware of how their parents were sharing their time and money. Our girls are very aware of the various organizations we support and when appropriate, they help out too. I want my daughters to not view sharing as something they ought to do, but something they LOVE to do. At first there was a little trepidation on their part, but I’m proud to say that today they are eager to share their money (and even their toys and clothes) with others.

Success Tip: If your kids are new to sharing, I would start with something tangible, rather than sending a check. Buy groceries together and deliver them to your local food shelf. See if they can even restock the shelves with the groceries you bought.

Wait … There’s Just One More Thing You Need to Do to Assess Your Financial Literacy

This should all seem easy and fun. And truthfully, learning about money is fun because you are ultimately figuring out the things that matter most to you and spending your money on those things, rather than keeping up with the Joneses and buying things you care little about. However, there is one caveat. Before you leap into the fun part—dreaming about how you will use your money—you need to know how strong your financial foundation is to ensure it can withstand your goals and dreams. To get you started, I’ve included a Wellness Checklist to help put your financial house in order. As parents, one of the most loving acts we can give our children is the gift of financial literacy. The ability to make smart money decisions will help them create the life they want and support their long-term financial well-being. They will now have the tools to truly conquer the world.

 

Shannon’s Bio: Shannon Ryan, CFP® is a Mom on a mission to help busy parents teach their children simple, value-based principles that guide their money decisions and support their long-term financial well-being. Visit http://theheavypurse.com/to learn more on how to raise Money Smart Kids.