By: Family Service PEI
Are you assertive enough in your everyday life? Being assertive is a necessary communication skill to practice in order to avoid being taken advantage of, and to protect yourself from harm and wrongdoing. Being assertive involves expressing your feelings honestly and comfortably, without violating the rights of others. It is a way of effectively expressing your likes, dislikes, interests, opinions and feelings in a way that people will easily understand. Being assertive also involves being able to politely disagree with others, saying no to others’ demanding requests, and taking a stand for what you feel is right.
So, what are the benefits of developing an assertive communicate style? It leads to better self-esteem and strong supportive relationships involving mutual respect. It lets others know that you are not willing to be taken advantage of and that you have a voice of your own. Furthermore, being assertive better prepares you to accept compliments and positive feedback.
However, it is important to understand and recognize the difference between being assertive and being aggressive. So, let’s break down the difference between the two:
Assertive Vs. Aggressive
– Speaking openly – Interrupting and talking over others
– Uses a conversational tone – Speaks loudly and abrupt
– Maintains good eye contact – Stares and glares at others
– Shows expressions that match the message – Intimidates others with expressions
– Relaxed appearance with open posture – Stands rigidly with crossed arms, invades personal space.
– Participates in groups – Controls groups
– Values self equal to others – Values self more than others
– Tries to hurt no one (including self) – Hurts others to avoid being hurt
Believe it or not, assertion is not a natural trait that we are born with, we must continue to learn and develop this skill regularly.