Tips on How to Handle Stress in Your Relationship.
In today’s world where people are struggling with issues such as employment, financial troubles, ailing family members, marital problems and other difficulties, stress is becoming more and more prevalent and crushing.
For some of us, stress has become normalized to the point where we do not even recognize the strain we are living under. But stress is insidious. It has a way of coming out when you are least expecting it. You might think you’re on top of things, but you transfer the result of stress to other areas of your life. And usually, you dump it on your nearest and dearest.
Everyone knows that stress can affect your mood, your sleeping habits, and your waistline, but did you know that stress can also affect your sex life?
Stress can completely derail your libido and sexual response.
Just as prolonged stress affects health, so too does prolonged stress affect one’s sex life. Stress is perhaps the number one culprit in men’s and women’s low sexual desire. Too much stress often chips away a person’s libido (desire), by affecting hormones and mood, and by interfering with the quality time that helps a couple stay connected.
Stress can cause uncomfortable mental and physical reactions such as feeling exhausted, grumpy, and anxious, and also making moments difficult to appreciate or be with your partner.
Laura Berman, Ph.D., director of the Berman Center for women’s sexual health in Chicago, says that “stress makes you tired, distracted and unmotivated to do anything, much less have sex.”
We also must be aware that stress isn’t the only reason why couples can have a declining sex life, but it can be one of the major factors. Dr Berman said, “Hormones, brain chemicals, stress, medications, and diet and exercise habits can all play a role.” Taking the time, and putting forth the effort to make a few lifestyle changes can create a big difference, especially those changes which relate directly to reducing stress.
It is important to understand how stressful events affect your marriage or relationship. Since you can’t avoid stressful situations, you have to be able to recognize and manage them. Finding a way to have a conversation about what is causing you stress, where you and your partner could talk about it and feel relieved and satisfied, can make your relationship stronger. Here are some tips on how to handle stress in your relationship.
Figure Out What is Bothering You
Stress is tricky. We often say “I’m so stressed out!” but have trouble figuring out what is causing these feelings. Take the time to find out where the problem is rooted, and share this information with your partner. This will better enable your partner to help you cope with your stress. With increased awareness of what you are worried about, together you can work on ways to reduce your stress levels.
Recognize that not every problem (or stressor) has a solution, but talking about it and sharing your feelings can help you manage it. Understand that if you don’t figure out how to successfully handle stress with your partner, problems in your marriage may emerge.
Stay Connected
Sometimes couples spend more time confiding in their friends rather than their spouses as they feel their partner might not understand them. Turning away from your partner during stressful events can be one of the most damaging behaviors in a relationship. This can lead to feelings of rejection. Silence leads to greater frustration and increased anger, which can drive the two of you apart.
Try to strengthen your relationship by turning to each other often. You can do this by simply talking about the every-day events that happen in your lives, like the news, a good movie you saw, or the accomplishments of your children. This builds the confidence and trust you both need so you can discuss heavier and potentially stressful topics when they arise.
Maintain Intimacy
Intimacy is an important part of any successful marriage. While many people think intimacy pertains only to sex, there is much more involved. By being open and honest we develop emotional intimacy. When we are stressed this is especially important. Intimacy gives your partner a chance to support you and in return, you are more likely to support them when they are stressed.